ROAD TRIP AUSSIE STYLE !!!!!!!!!!
When I think about other countries there are always landmark images that spring to my mind. Iconic, Beautiful and quintessentially of that particular country. If I ever go to America I’m going to do a road trip and go and check out Mount Rushmore and the Grand Canyon.In France I'd visit the Eiffel Tower, and vineyards at Bordeaux.And a road trip in England would have to include Big Ben and Stonehenge.
Let me tell you what Australians think about when we plan a road trip. It’s not Uluru or the Daintree Rain Forests. It’s BIG things. Freakishly big things. We are obsessed in this country with making things big that should be normal sized. And then plonking them by the roadside to scare the crap out of unsuspecting tourists. And then making them buy tacky souvenirs of the BIG thing they've just visited. I know there is some place in America that has the world biggest ball of string, but really our big stuff beats that hands down.
We are inordinately proud of our BIG things here. So proud in fact that we have about 150 of them scattered across the country. And it is the law that they must be referred to in conversation and in writing prefaced by the word BIG – just like that in capitals. Naturally we have a BIG kangaroo, and a BIG koala and other BIG marsupials but we also have some other random big things that are pretty darn funny. And some are just plain bloody ridiculous.
Does that koala look like he's about to go postal? Imagine bombing along the Highway and coming across that round a corner in the middle of nowhere.
So, grab some beer and a pizza,pack your salty pretzels and come with me on an Aussie Road Trip to check out some of our BIG things.
First stop is 20 minutes from my house at the BIG rocking horse which stands 18 metres (60 feet) high. Can you imagine cleaning up poop from that?
What road trip would be complete without the BIG red back spider. Scary shit. Literally. That's a dunny it's perched on in parody of a very famous Australian song called "Redback on the Toilet Seat" . Google it...
Next stop is the big rolling pin. I'm seeing giant pies ....Mmmmmmmmmm...Pie.
Yes we have a Big Pie too!
The Big Mower. I have to ask ...why? About now I need to stop for a toilet break and some greasy roadhouse food because I haven't eaten since the big rolling pin.
Fruit Salad anyone? The Big Fruit Bowl. I'm driving straight past because I filled up at the big pie.
We also have the Big Banana , The Big Orange and The Big Pineapple.
Seafood anyone? ..The Big Lobster reminds me of something from a Japanese monster movie from the 1950's. My parents used to live 15 minutes from Larry here. When you've seen him 4 million times he ceases to be exciting.
The Big Trout (looks like a dolphin to me )
The big Prawn ( aka Big Shrimp- which is actually an oxymoron because shrimp is small and this is HUGE )
Only in Australia can you road trip it to the big cigarette...seriously. Just looking at it makes me want to smoke.
The Big Beer ...(in Darwin of course)
The Big Bottle of Bundy (Bundaberg Rum) Imagine the hangover that would give you...
May I present the Big Stubby ( a stubby is a bottle of beer)
The BIG camera.
The Big Poo ..
We love our big things. And if you laugh at us, we'll kick your butt with our big gumboot.
Good Bye from Australia's Big Things ...all 150 of them.
There 's nothing like a country with a sense of humour. Thank Goodness we can laugh at ourselves.